sean -- 8d The world belongs to the self-aware replyThe world belongs to the self-aware
thread · root d44eace5…49c5 · depth 4 · · selected b57d0ee6…70d1
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root d44eace5…49c5 · depth 4 · · selected b57d0ee6…70d1
There are three groups that people who had bad childhoods belong to.I’ve learned over the years that a bad childhood is a specific thing. It’s not being poor, or living in chaos oreven necessarily being abused though it often does contain all those things. Abuse especially.It’s something more particular than just I was abused/neglected/mistreated. Whatever the mechanism, it’s when achild comes into adulthood with a feeling that they are inherently worthless.The first group are those who get crushed under the weight of it. The weight of “worthlessness” is real and mostpeople break under it. Bad childhoods predict worse outcomes on almost every measurable dimension income,health, relationships, addictions etc… this is the largest and most common group. We interact with people likethis often, unfortunately bad childhoods are not rare.A second smaller group are those who actually find peace with it. Usually through therapy or faith or time. Theybecome healthier and happier. They find worth inside themselves. They reframe the experience and begin to tellthemselves a new story about why they are worthy of love, affection, care etc… they go on to have happy andfulfilling lives. They spread love to others because they remember what it felt like to be worthless. Wesometimes meet a wonderful person like this. They are beautiful souls.The third group are ultra rare. They are the ones who neither heal, nor allow themselves to be crushed by theweight of the wound. It creates a motor that never turns off, and it’s why people with bad childhoods sometimessucceed at extraordinarily high levels. These are the people who attempt to justify their existence withexternal achievement. They set out to show the world they do have worth.The ones who succeed stay inside the wound long enough to let it drive them somewhere, without letting it killthem along the way. This is a painful and costly archetype because the task itself is infinite by design. Everysuccess gets metabolized in about 72 hours and you’re back to needing the next one. It’s genuine rocket fuel,and it never stops burning, but it comes with a heavy cost. You can’t resolve an internal wound with externalachievement. The survivors who transmute the wound into achievement are visible precisely because they’re therare exception. We usually see these people on tv. We often admire and lookup to them.I’ve known people in all three groups. The first deserve more compassion than they get. The second havesomething the third will spend their entire lives chasing and never quite reach. And the third will build thingsthe world remembers, and die wondering if it was ever enough.
I think possible dark sides of 3 are self destruction and/or abandonment of morals through the process
I spent years in that phase. now I'm not looking for any peace in this world, but to channel that dark energyinto a holy fire that burns stasis and comfort in the crucible of savage action
The world belongs to the self-aware
I think possible dark sides of 3 are self destruction and/or abandonment of morals through the process
67c23416…1c2b -- 8d [parent] | reply [1 reply]I spent years in that phase. now I'm not looking for any peace in this world, but to channel that dark energy into a holy fire that burns stasis and comfort in the crucible of savage action